Both, And.

Ampersand thinking.

Having an 'ampersand' way of thinking has been life-changing for me.

Operating in a very 'black or white', 'one or the other', kind of thinking left me lonely and it destroyed many relationships in my life.

Several years ago, I attended a counseling center and I was introduced to the 'both, and' way of thinking. Wrapping my brain around the idea that people hurt us AND they love us at the same time opened up a door of hope.

Walking through this door allowed me to start believing that I didn't need to choose one way or the other. I could feel hurt and healed. I could be sad and happy. Learning to be in the mixture, as opposed to running from all the bad, helped me eventually be willing to be in the mixture of betrayal and restoration.